Dear Auntie DD,
My chaperone is busy playing whist and a charming gentleman that I’ve never met before has just invited me to take a turn on the terrace with him. What are the chances that we’ll be spotted by the Ton’s biggest gossip and be forced to get engaged before sunrise?
Sincerely,
Twenty years old and never been kissed
Dear TYOANBK,
The chances of your being caught are calculated through a complex algorithm based on:
- the inappropriateness of the match (he’s the disowned/illegitimate son of a prince/duke who’s broken hearts and cherries all over the Continent, and you’re … you)
- squared by the animal vitality of your suitor,
- multiplied by your dowry and/or the number of widowed dependents/orphaned younger siblings you drag behind you like dead weight.
Which is to say… “very high.”
My advice? If you’re going to be ruined anyway, get a jump on the gossip and smash that. You never know when one of you might be taken out by consumption.
(Unless, of course, you’re living that Clean and Wholesome life, in which case, forget everything I just said and be patient. He’ll probably kiss you by the end of the book. But no promises.)
Feeling like a bad influence and loving it,
Auntie DD
Auntie DD is our agony aunt in residence for all those awkward questions our dear characters so like to struggle with
0 comments on “Dear Auntie DD…”